Those who have aided me on my journey

May 9, 2016

May 2016, so many things have changed in my life since this time in 2012. Four years ago it was officially decided that I would be spending my senior year abroad in Germany. It seems like an eternity ago when I left my high school as a student for the last time, most people not even knowing I was never coming back until well into the time I was gone. Three years ago (2013) I was counting down the 40 days and 40 nights until my arrival back in Rockbridge, not being able to call it home because I can no longer honestly say where home is because my heart has its place in so many places around the world now. Two years ago (May 2014) I reconnected with the one person who has made the largest impact in my life since high school. My time with them wound up being much shorter than expected and I don’t even have to use my “I can only imagine…” statement when I talk about what they are doing now. The circumstances are different but the journey follows  a similar path and I hope they are enjoying it to its full potential. One year ago (May 2015) it was accepted I would not be soon enjoying time out of the United States. I earned my first degree, saw the lowest GPA of my life, made a trip to New York, and was involved in my very first motor vehicle accident and was accepted to the university of my dreams. I made a major milestone on that Friday and the following Monday I was in the ambulance driving to the hospital more concerned about how the wreck would change the other people in my life than my immediate feelings. That day changed my life in so many ways, so many things were clearer and I thought the path of my future  was crystal clear. Now it is May 2016 and I am about to finish my first (and hardest academic) year of four year school. I have a small group of incredible friends who have helped me through the transition that is university. I have accepted great loss to the friends who are important to me but no longer a part of my life. It has taken me time to see it is not always selfish to take care of myself first. I miss the lost and I love the memories we shared together. It is possible one day we will be okay again but I do not see that day in the near future. I do however see a future with people who seem to be in it for the long run, a full commitment of long time commitment.

It is amazing what I have learned from people during my journey since leaving home for the second time. Now my mom puts me on airplanes and drops me off at the “kiss and fly” spot. I am not going “home” again any time soon, the number of days of living in my childhood home are dwindling down. Soon I will no longer “live at home” and will have a life which has been shaped and guided by all the people who were/are important in my life. For all the people I have known and loved I can assure you there is a habit or something I do on a weekly basis and every time I do it I think of you, the one who taught me just to do it that way. I love all the people have guided me on my journey thus far and have room to love more as I am sure the amount of people I can love is not near its limit yet.

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One Response to “Those who have aided me on my journey”

  1. Mary Hawthorne said

    Mary, I am so touched by your sensitivity and maturity of insight.
    I hope I never bore you by telling you what an amazing young woman you are! Big Daddy and I speak of you often and are confident you are laying a strong foundation on which to build your dreams for the future.

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